I am an absent friend
But you will always see me
I won’t be faraway
So you can always get to me
I am an absent friend
But I will go out of my way
To give you any help you need
When you need one
I tend to live in my own world
Embracing my loneliness with warmth
I am bad at keeping up communication
And I am really sorry to
Those who takes that personally
In the depth of my heart
there lies my pain
the pains I get when
my emotions turn jagged
and my inside tight
Waiting with wide eyes
my heart hanging in my mouth
hoping for kindness
like a child I longed for
soothing
Instead I get balked
Pushing back against pain
for so long
medicating with friendship
yet returns in my weaker moment
and devastating my mind
I’ve come to realise
what endless pain would be
When I would wake up one morning
realising I was dead
buried and forgotten by those
who are dear and close to me
but alive and kicking to strangers;
people who don’t give a damn about me
I have known pain
when I go to sleep with it
every night and seeing myself
being lowered in my own grave
when I scream to those
mourning and burying me but
no one hears my scream and whimpers
I’ve never been a person
to hold a grudge instead
seeking to understand the
motives of another
It doesn’t mean there
is no scars
only that I have no
forgiveness of them
to forgive I must first resent
or at least that’s my understanding
Perhaps that’s how I heal so well
Anyhow, perhaps my scars
are my road map
maybe I’d be lost without them
The things I wish to have
Never became mine
The things I desired
Were always unbearable
The unbearable
becomes desirable
The love I dream of
Was never always mine
The happiness I seek
Was never found
I searched for trust
I got betrayal as a trophy
I longed for happiness
I won sadness as a prize
All what I got
Are never the things
I wish to have.
My heart ache
My soul bleeds
When I miss the
things I never had
What do I to do
To get the things I
Never had?
Many people are stuck in the past, simply because they can’t let go of it. They imprisoned themselves in their horrible past experience. They fail to see beyond where they stand. We don’t have control over the past there are just times in our lives when we have to realize our past is precisely what it is, and we cannot change it. But we can change the story we tell ourselves about it, and by doing that, we can change the future.
The future will be the product of the action that is taken now but remember that now becomes then just as tomorrow becomes yesterday, the future will also become the the present then eventually becomes the past.
The past is gone, the future is yet to come you only have now, start building a better future. We don’t really own time, the time we own is now. Let’s begin to invest in it.
It would have been great if we could time travel, we go back to the past to correct our mistakes, then go to the future to see what it looks like so we can know how to live the time we have now but that’s not possible in real life it only happens in movies.
Funny enough, some people go back living in the past instead of moving to the future because they fail to spend their time wisely. Let me give you an instance, you were broke yesterday and today you earned $300, if you can’t spend the money wisely you will be broke again tomorrow. The way you live now will determine what your future would look like.
How our mind construct the past, present and future depends on our relationship with time.
Sometimes we can’t be present to the possibilities of our future until we navigate a peaceful path through the aftermath of our past. If you want to fly to the sky, you need to leave the earth. If you want to move forward, you need to let go the past that drags you down and the time to let go is now.
Let me share you a story;
“Once upon a time, there was a young man who was passionate, dynamic, and hopeful. He had dreams. He was certain he would make them come true. He met a young woman. They fell in love. She was also passionate and hopeful. She also had dreams. She was also certain. They dove into life, pursuing their dreams, everything was focused on the future. They made the sacrifices they thought they had to make. They gave up on present pleasures to pursue future hopes. They kept believing, even when it was difficult. Somewhere along the way, things changed. Things didn’t turn out the way they were supposed to. The things that were sacrificed stayed gone, but the things they were sacrificed for never really materialised. The passionate, hopeful young couple became disappointed, worn-down, middle-aged. Where did it all go wrong, and what do they do now? How can we be faithful to the future without losing the present?”
From the story, despite the couple having strong hopes towards the future they never got the future the dream of having. Didn’t they have a good relationship with time?
Slave trade was abolished but that doesn’t make you a free man. Do you really think you are a free man? Or do you ever imagined you are still held as a slave? These are unanswered questions and you need to seek for their answers. This story will light your path to finding answers to the questions.
Many years ago, the whole of Africa nations were held as slaves. Some served as slaves in their motherlands while some served in the white men lands. Nigeria was one of those nations who lived as slaves for many decades all in the name of colonisation. Although, some parts in the country became victims as a result of the greediness of some traditional rulers and some as war victims.
It took many years before the slave trade ended and when it did, those who didn’t die were set free to go back to their countries. Some could trace their way back home while some couldn’t. Have you ever wondered why we have black people in America living as citizens? Like I said earlier, the Africans who lost their way back home occupied some parts in the European countries then they keep on increasing in numbers as a result of reproduction. They became the second largest racial group and third largest ethnic group in America. They are called Africa Americans also refferd to as BLACK AMERICANS OR AFRO AMERICANS. The so called black Americans are the descendants of the enslaved black people.
Like I said earlier, Nigeria was also among the enslaved nations but thanks to some good men who fought for our freedom. They started the nationalism movement and it became a success and that was how slave trade ended in Nigeria. It ended, but do you think it really ended? It’s the beginning of the end, the birth of a new era in slavery. The birth of the modern day slavery, “IT’S SLAVERY IN NEW APPAREL”
The modern day slavery is something we walked into on our own and our modern day slave masters took advantage of our ignorance unlike our forefathers who were forcibly put into slavery. They modern day slavery has penetrated into different nations in the world today but developed and developing nations.
Slavery continued to the present day after its abolishment many decades ago and the major factor that contributed to the growth of the modern day slavery is unemployment which resulted into poverty in some parts of the world today.
The modern day slavery is a by-product of poverty as a result of lack of education, the rule of law, anarchy and poor Societal structure which create an environment that fosters the acceptance and propagation of slavery.
In the ancient form of slavery, slave owners spent more on getting slaves. It was more difficult of them to be disposed of. The cost of keeping them healthy was considered a better invested than getting another slave to replace them. In modern slavery, people are easier to get at a lower price so replacing them when exploiters run into problem become easier.
The modern day slavery has taken various forms such as ;trafficking, sex slave, prison slavery, bounded, government labour etc. A common example of the modern day slavery can be seen between employers and employee, the workers work more but they are pay less, and when they complain they are fired and they will be replaced. The fear of becoming unemployed has rendered many no choice of voicing out, so to keep their job they have to keep quiet and keep on tolerating. Do you call this freedom when you still have the fear to speak up for yourself? There is no freedom anywhere, no independent. The truth is that, slavery has taken new forms. It’s slavery in new apparel.
We believe everyone, everywhere has the right to a life free from slavery. But right now, millions of children and adults are trapped in slavery in every single country in the world. Including yours.
Modern slavery is the severe exploitation of other people for personal or commercial gain. Modern slavery is all around us, but often just out of sight. People can become entrapped making our clothes, serving our food, picking our crops, working in factories, or working in houses as cooks, cleaners or nannies.
From the outside, it can look like a normal job. But people are being controlled – they can face violence or threats, be forced into inescapable debt, or have had their passport taken away and are being threatened with deportation. Many have fallen into this oppressive trap simply because they were trying to escape poverty or insecurity, improve their lives and support their families. Now, they can’t leave.
People end up trapped in modern slavery because they are vulnerable to being tricked, trapped and exploited, often as a result of poverty and exclusion. It is these external circumstances that push people into taking risky decisions in search of opportunities to provide for their families, or are simply pushed into jobs in exploitative conditions.
Success is not just an ordinary word, it is a powerful word that had awaken the intellectual sagacity of many people. Success had been what many people had been racing for, it is what many students are always aspiring to achieve at the end of every academic year, and it is what every business man always hope for, it is what many surgeons have in mind before going into the theatre to come out with a smile on their face after a successful surgery, it is what teachers awaits in their students, it is what parents expects in their children after many years of labor.
Nevertheless, with all these expectation and aspiration, success won’t be served to you on a golden plate you have to work for it. Money can be given to you, gifts can be given but you have to be hardworking before you could get hold of success. There is this common saying that “the journey to a thousand miles begin with a single step” so is success. Your journey to success began the time you never imagined, it began the time you were just a tiny cluster of cells to the time you developed to being a foetus to the time you were given birth to, to the time you started crawling to the time you stood up on your feet to the time you took your first step to the time you started running and falling but you keep on rising like a phoenix. Your journey to success started the day you got fertilized as an egg in your mother’s womb till where you are today. If you think you have not achieved anything so far then let me remind you that you have been fighting for your life right inside your mother’s womb because you could have died from the drugs she took, from the water she drank, from the food she ate but you fought for nine months as a mere foetus because your aim is to see a different world outside your mother’s womb. If you didn’t give up as a foetus why do you want to give up now?
“Don’t give up on your journey to success, your birth shows you are a step closer to achieving your goals if not you could have died right in the womb” – Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
Furthermore, let me ask you this, do you know what success is? Do you have what it takes to be successful? Do you know the pain of being called a failure? For you to achieve success you must stay FOCUS on your DREAM you must WORKHARD to make your dream come true you must be DETERMINED to your achieving your goals you must have the of not want to be called a FAILURE. I don’t know how you are going to go about it but you must WIN to become your own definition of success but remember, “There is no short cut to success” you have to take every single steps overcoming every obstacles, you have to fail and fail and keep on failing until you pass. For you to become successful you need the prominent keys to unlock closed doors as you set out on your journey to success. These keys will be discovered as you read further.
KEY #1 – DREAM
Many people believed that a dream is a succession of images, ideas, emotions and sensations that usually occur involuntarily in the mind during a certain stages of sleep. That’s not all about dream, dream is not something we just see in our dream when succeeding is attached to it.
“Dream is what stopped you from sleeping”
Your goal is something you dream of achieving and you won’t sleep until you reach your goal. So therefore, “dream is not what you see in sleep it is what stops you from sleeping.” To become successful in life you must set a goal and keep on dreaming until you achieved your goal.
“Never set limit to what you can achieve, you can achieve more than what you dreamt of, there shouldn’t be full stop on your journey to success just commas” – Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
And it is never too late to start dreaming. C.S Lewis said “you are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream”. And “you have to start dreaming today so you could wake up tomorrow realizing your dream had become a reality”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel. Because “There is nothing worth celebrating than a dream becoming a reality – Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel. If you really want to live a successful life you need to start dreaming today and you keep following your dream. “What is not started today is never finished tomorrow”—Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe. Like I said earlier, “success is not a destination it is a journey”. “Set out on your journey to success leaving your trail behind not following other people’s path”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel. Dream and follow your dream and live for your dream alone not other people’s. “Do not follow where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail- Ralph Waldo Emerson. Dream is very important on your way to success, you have to “Dream as if you will live forever, live as if you will die today- James Dean. “Don’t just live in a dream world but dream and turn your dream to reality”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel. Because “there are some people who live in a dream world and then there are some who face reality; and there are those who turn one into another”- Douglas H. Everett. Have this in mind, don’t just dream alone. There is a little distance between dream and reality and that is ACTION. Dreaming without acting on your dream is just a mere child sleep.
KEY # 2- FOCUS
Focus is another prominent key to success. Dreaming alone won’t be lead through your journey to success. For your to achieve your aim, you need to have a clear goal and objectives and your hard work should be dedicated towards making your dream into a reality.
Being focused will make you quicker if your focus is on a single dream, you will be able to avoid distractions, your brain becomes focused on making your dream become reality. This would give you the opportunity to achieve your goal much quickly rather than trying to make two dreams come true at a time.
Furthermore, to achieve your more difficult long term goals, you need to be disciplined to stay the course. When you set huge goals, it might appear difficult for you to achieve but all you need to do in such situation is to break big goals into smaller, more attainable goals so you could make more progress towards your dream.
“Stay focused, go after your dream and keep moving towards your goals”- LL Cool J.
If you were able to focus on a goal, this would increase your chances of achievement. When it comes to making achievement in your business or personal life, you must be persistent in making it become a reality.
“Our focus is our future and what we focus on will multiply in our life”- David DeNotaris.
Many people ended up in life as failure because they tend to focus on what could go wrong rather than what could go right. This is the reason many had not taken a single step towards success. Don’t waste all your energy on all the bad situations rather use 100% of your focus in creating a desirable outcome; your future depends on it.
“Focus on the possibilities for success not on the potential for failure” – Napoleon Hill.
Similarly to how your dream is important on your journey towards a successful life so is your focus. You need to start focusing on your strength not on your weakness, focus on your character not your reputation, and focus on your blessing not your misfortune. Focus on what could go right not what could go wrong, remember what you have done right not what you have done wrong. The road to success isn’t smooth, there are a lot of obstacles and challenges before you of which you might not overcome but don’t give up on winning all you need to do is take a deep breath and shift your focus to something positive. Your focus is what gives you positive energy on your journey to success. You have to avoid all distraction that comes your way to avoid derailment. To become successful is a herculean task, don’t start thinking about failing without trying that would only make you a loser. If at all you are going fail, fail after trying not failing before you try.
“Failing after trying and not giving up makes you a successful failure” – Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
KEY # 3 DERTERMINATION
Determination as a positive emotional feeling which involves your perseverance towards a difficult goal in spite of obstacles. Your determination serves as your behavioral motivator that will help you to achieve your goal.
You might have a great dream or a 100% focus avoiding not to be distracted towards achieving your goal but your strong determination and will power to succeed matters a lot. People might call your success story a luck, there is no problem about that but one thing for sure is that luck only works for those who have the will power to win. Psychologist states that “determination is a positive emotion that pushes an individual towards action and result in important outcomes such as perseverance and determination takes success”. Staying determined to achieve your dreams will stop you from giving up despite obstacles and challenges. Being determined means to have a focus with a strong desire and actions to bring your dream into reality.
“It is your will power to win that determines your success”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
Sometimes ago, I read a tweet that says “it is not about winning that matters at times it is being part of the race” I laughed when I read the tweet, such post can be good as a good morning messages on social media but not in reality.
Joel Osteen said, “It takes determination to see a dream come to pass, the question is not will you start but will you finish”.
Everything you do, every step you take is all about making your dreams come true. Like I once said, “you shouldn’t follow where there is path you should go instead where there is no path and leave a trail” and if you couldn’t find a way then you make a way.
“Desire is the key to motivation but it is determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal- a commitment to excellence that will enable you to attain the success you seek”- Mario Andretti.
Don’t forget I once said you shouldn’t limit yourself to what you can achieve, you can achieve more than what you could imagine if you have the determination of succeeding all you need to do is to take a step then you keep on going.
“A great man can be as great as he wants to be, if you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done”- Vince Lombardi.
If you are not determined you can’t be successful. The purpose of this life has always lies on determination, work and success. The reason many people fail is because they do not have the determination and perseverance, extra ordinary people are determined and that what makes them extra ordinary. Success cannot be served to you, it is you determination that will make you a successful person.
“You might fail and fail and keep on failing but you must be determined to succeed one day, don’t stop during your stormy days”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
Your determination will contribute greatly to your success journey. You won’t be able to overcome failure if you have zero determination to being successful. “Action and determination are two habits you must develop at the forefront of all success”- Machi Block.
KEY # 4- BELIEF
Believing in yourself is one of your greatest weapon to overcome any obstacles that might come your way on your journey to success even when all odds are against you or when your chances of winning are low, you have to learn how to believe in yourself because that’s what you need to achieve your goal.
“Believe in yourself even when nobody believes you, it is the belief you have in yourself that will make you succeed in life not the believe people have in you.”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
It is possible for you to succeed if no one believes you but you may not succeed if you do not believe in yourself. And if they believes you, that means they placed a great responsibility which is more like a challenge you must overcome by your own belief in wining. People believing you means they have the faith in you even though they know you are weak.
“When faith is entrusted in a weak man he derives strength in it”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
Dreaming is one that, believing your dreams can become a reality is another. Someone once said “dreams come true for those who believe in it” meaning if you believe in dreams coming true then your dream will definitely come to pass.
If you have a dream just believe in achieving it even when you can’t feel it deep in your heart any words of encouragement, just believe in your dream and your heart will finally show you the way. There is nothing you can achieve without you believing you can, Henry Marsh said “Our success is measured by personal belief not by anybody else’s standard or belief” and if you are the type that look down on yourself then Anita Folly was right when she said “Belief is the first step in the transformation process that will really make a difference in your life”. It is what you belief about yourself that other people will belief about you too. People will only see what you want them to see just like the gene magic in Aladdin’s movie. If you could believe in the myths and legendary story then why can’t you believe in your dreams?
“It is the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief and once that belief becomes a deep conviction, thins begin to happen”- Mohammed Ali.
The journey to a thousand mile begin with a single step. Your journey to successful life has many steps for you to climb and one of those steps is you believing you can succeed in spite of all obstacles and challenges that comes your way.
KEY #5 -COURAGE
The road to success is not a smooth one, there are obstacles and challenges. For you to overcome all this, your courage which is your choice and willingness to confront agony, pain, danger, uncertainty or intimidation etc. is needed. To overcome the battle before you, you must process the physical and moral courage. Your physical courage will make you brave in the face of physical pain, hardship, death or death threat while your moral courage will give you the ability to act rightly in the face of popular opposition, shame, scandal, discouragement or personal loss. These are the things you will face as your journey to success keeps going farther, it is the price you must be ready to pay and the only currency to pay for it is your courage. People want to see you succeed in life but not as better than them and they will always discourage you if you have a better plan than what they have. Your past will be brought up to torment you but you need to be courageous in times like this, you shouldn’t give up.
“Courage isn’t the strength to go on, it is going on when you don’t have the strength”- Napoleon Bonaparte.
During your journey to success, you shouldn’t waste your time living someone else’s life, don’t be trapped by dogma- which is living with the result of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinion drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your hear and intuition.
Courage is the most important of all virtues, because without your courage you can’t practice any other virtue consistently. When you feel like there is no other way for you to go, your courage is what makes you push harder, it tells you never to give up on your journey. Your courage is resistance to fear, if you have the courage it requires then you will keep matching forward toward achieving your goals. Many challenges will come your way but you shouldn’t run away from it, you have to face it and triumph over it.
“You shouldn’t be afraid of losing but you should be able to muster the courage to win”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
KEY #6- MOTIVATION
Motivation will play also play a key role in achieving your goals. Whether you become successful in life or not, whether you reach your goal or not, whether your dreams turns to reality or remain just a dream. This is applicable to all regardless of status, profession or age.
“There is nothing you can achieve without the zeal to reach your goal”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
In every step you take, you must be motivated to go over to the next step. To be successful, you have to use each day as an opportunity to improve, to be better, and to get a little bit closer to your goals. If you really wish to be successful in life then you should know that success won’t come looking for you, you have to go out and get it. If you want success, you should be able to work harder because the harder you work the greater you feel when you achieve it.
If you are not motivated enough you will end up giving up on achieving your goal.
“Don’t wait for anyone or thing to motivate you, be your own motivation”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
KEY #7- FEAR
Are you thinking if your fear make you become successful? Well I’m proud to inform you that your fear is going to play a key role on your journey to success if you can figure what your fear is and use it to your advantage.
The word FEAR actually has two meaning, the first one is Forget Everything And Run while the latter is Face Everything And Rise, and it’s now your call to define your fear. Many people sees their fear and run away from it and that is why they are unsuccessful today. Your fear shouldn’t be your weakness it should be your strength. There is no crime in having fear the crime is not overcoming the fear while you allow it to pin you down.
Many couldn’t take risk because they are scared of what will happen if everything goes wrong instead of thinking about what could go right. One of the 48 laws of power is knowing who your enemy is and knowing how to use them, same thing with identifying what your fear is and using it to your advantage. If you are scared of failing then you will end up as a failure. Do you know why? It is because you didn’t give it a try, you allowed your fear to hold you back, you failed before trying. You forgot that your success story is incomplete if you didn’t talk about your failure”- Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
The very first step to success is failure, if you succeed without failing or facing challenges that means you took the short cut to the top. The mistakes you make resulted to your failure and mistakes are very important to man because without mistakes there won’t be correction and without correction learning won’t take place. Instead of letting your fear hold you back, why not let it push you forward. If your fear is falling why not give it a try and see if you fall or stand firmly. If Bill Gate let his fear held him back his name wouldn’t have been in the world record today. If you keep allowing your fear to hold you back then you won’t be able to take a step making your dream a reality.
Furthermore, underneath your fear lies a great opportunities. Because when you start doing things that scares you the most, tearing down invisible barriers that separate you from the good life, you become the person you have always dreamt about in your mind. Overcoming your fear is a life changing decision. Fear will always be around you to tell you what you can’t do- it’s up to you to face your fears and tell yourself that you can.
“A man who wishes to be successful must find out what he can do not what he is scared he couldn’t do” – Ogunsola Ayobami Samuel.
Learning how to handle fear and overcoming it will help you have the life you dream of.
CONCLUSION
Becoming successful in life is not a matter of background, intelligence or native ability, it is not family and friends that made us do extraordinary things. Instead, the ability to bring out the best in ourselves under all circumstances. It is the ability to accept that life won’t be fair to us always and we will always see the other side of life.
Within you is the potential and ability that if properly put into good use, you will be able to accomplish extraordinary things with your life.
The prominent keys will enable you to;
Decide exactly what you want and where you want to go.
Set a deadline and make a plan to get there.
Take actions on your plan, take a step everyday towards achieving your goal.
Be persistence until you succeed that you will never ever give up.
These will help you in developing yourself and you will evolve and grow to become an extraordinary person.
And don’t forget success is not a destination, success is a journey and there is no full stops in success just commas.
They gaze at the stars
Heart quavering, beating like drum beats
Stream of tears pouring on the pale land
Memories full of dreams
Cut off, aborted
O! Save them
They have a tune to dance to
Dwelling in Poverty’s compound
Clad in tattered rags
Undetected sickness breakthrough
Waiting for neighbour’s
So as to welcome a square meal
In the middle of the day
To feed the rumbling stomachs
Difference in language is a barrier
Lack of communication arises
No higher place to go without the key
Education the key to any door
Gathered on the field
Laying down their dreams
Reflecting on their innocent eye balls
Trapped in darkness of doubt
But never lose hope
All shall never remain the same
There’s a reason their life started like this
Help the living dead build their hope
And make your promises come true
Education you promised
Where’s it?
Has it vanished to an unknown land?
Or has it been fed on by your greedy blood?
The innocent children are dying
Save them!
Security you promised
Not fulfilled, while fresh pepper is planted
On the pale land
SAVE THEM!
SAVE THE PEOPLE!
SAVE THEIR DREAM!!
When strength lies in quietness
My mouth refuses to rest but catches
My strength to rend
With fretful words, it takes away my gentleness
When fools in silence are counted wise
My mouth through myriads of
Words, bring me lower than a fool
Crushing me with weighty constructions
It stands atop me like a bull
When my life craves its blessing
And would have loved my mouth to pray
My mouth refuses bit chooses my
Blessings to fray
Through murmuring and complain I watch
Lifes goodness running far, far away
My mouth you are the traitor, I therefore
Will strive to quiet you.
In a world once peaceful
Now overtaken by oppression
A world without rule
Where deceit reign and
Might is right
A world of hunger and suffering
Of treachery and horror
A world of adultery and infidelity
Of gambling and perdition
A world of vanity
Of loneliness cold and harsh
A world that never smile
Of sinister laugh, grief and despair
A world that invites but is never at home.
Of plenty but scarcely offers
A world without priorities
When man strive to become beast
A world where life has no value
But death is hated yet revered
A world that your are the nucleus
Give us a new world
With love filled with happiness
Reassuring real for me, for me
For today, for posterity
A world yet only you can put
The wind
Back to its sail
Julius and Julia walk home hand-in-hand, just soaking in giddiness. He says that even with the most delicious food, if you eat it too fast, you’ll get indigestion. He doesn’t want them to get indigestion of the heart by going too fast.
Julia asks a little wistfully, “What if there isn’t much time?” and he scoffs that it’s not like she’s going to die tomorrow. She’s so happy to just sit there holding his hand that she insists on one minute longer.
Julius mom arrives with pastries for him, and they jump up in alarm, barely managing to unlock their hands before she comes up to the roof. She wonders what Kate was doing here so late, and julius awkwardly invents an errand she was here for and sends her home.
Julius mom catches on right away and comments on kate’s level and size, and warns him not to even try foot-acting in front of her. She knows they’re dating and calls him out on it, but he shoves a pastry in his mouth and ignores her.
Julius insists that there’s nothing going on with him and Kate , and she says he can call it whatever he wants, just as long as he’s using condoms. He groans and asks if she really wants to be talking about this stuff with her son, but she says it’s better than him making babies by accident. Truth. Listen to your
mother!
She finally leaves, and julius rushes to text Julia that it’s safe to come back. She’s relieved to hear that it went okay, and pouts when he says they should head inside. She mentions getting enough sleep earlier at the motel, and he gets all fired up again at the mention of the motel, and bans the word altogether.
In the middle of the night, Julia sneaks out of kate’s room and into julius’s, to watch him sleep. She lies down next to him and is actually able to touch his face, and she sighs, “You’re a ghost—how can you like him for real? What are you going to do? You’re crazy.”
She tells herself that it’s okay because she’s just enjoying the feeling of being in a relationship, though she doesn’t sound convinced.
Kate comes outside to get a glass of water and runs into Julia as she’s coming out of julius room. Julia quickly says she was just wandering about because she was bored, and feels awkward when kate sweetly calls her aunty.
In the morning, julius is the one sending Julia little signals in front of the others, as he winks at her to meet him in the locker room. He feeds her herbs to keep her healthy in the sweltering heat, and she presses his hand to her face, calling that her best medicine.
Felix interrupts them to tell Julia about a phone call for her, and looks curiously over at julius , who’s doing a terrible job of acting natural. She picks up the phone and doesn’t realize that it’s julius’s mom on the line, and when she asks for her birthdate, she accidentally answers with her own, not kate’s.
Not knowing this, Mrs Jane reads the fortune at her request, and says that this girl is already dead. Mom says that can’t be and tells her about catching Julia and Kate together last night, and Mrs Jane realizes that she’s talking about Julia . She gets hopeful to hear that they were together late at night, but deflates to hear that they were simply talking.
**********
Officer John drops Lisa off at the restaurant and waits to greet julius , and happens to hear Julia humming a familiar tune. He remembers her singing the same song at her Dad’s restaurant years ago, and the way she’d smile to greet him.
Kate does the same now, and it makes him eerily fixated on her. It continues to bother him when he’s at work, as he remembers Dad’s shoelaces tied in Julia’s special way, and he looks up Kate’s information on the computer.
That night, John opens up his drawer and takes out the cracked cell phone that was hidden away.
He contemplates the phone and then takes out a suitcase that’s filled with scary serial kidnapping and/or murder gear and broken security cameras, and tosses the phone inside too.
********
On their way home from Julia’s dad restaurant whom they both ran into at the market earlier that day after julia had introduced him to her dad as a friend.
Julius squirms like a big baby when Julia gets ready to prick his finger to relieve his indigestion, and she asks why he ate two whole bowls of rice. He says that it was the polite thing to do in front of an elder, and he felt bad for the him(Julia’s dad) , who had such sad eyes when he talked about his daughter passing away.
He’s feeling better by the walk back, so she requests more handholding. He’s only happy to oblige, and looks a little sad when she breaks contact to run over to a playground. He chases her around, and then makes a big fuss when she trips and falls.
He sits her down to check her foot and treats her so tenderly that she swoons all over again. He wonders why she’s staring, and she replies, “Because I like you. I like you so, so much.” There’s a long pause as they look at each other without saying a word, and then they sit on the swings together, holding hands.
She says that she was too busy to do anything but work, and she thanks him so sincerely for all her new experiences that he darts up and declares that they’ll go on an overnight trip.
She asks why he changed his mind when he was so against her trying to jump him before, and he half-mumbles an admission: “I changed my mind. I want to go on a trip with you. I’m not going to hold back anymore, so you’ve been warned.” It’s her turn to be stunned silent.
Meanwhile, Julia is in a very different mood on the other side of the wall, and leaves kate’s body to go visit Mrs Jane in the middle of the night. She terrifies her awake, of course, being a ghost and all, and tells her about the trip with julius.
She thinks that’s good news, but wonders why Julia looks so sad about it. She doesn’t understand it either—tomorrow she could get what she’s been wanting all this time and finally resolve her grudge and move on…
Julia finally declared that she is not happy and she liked julius so much. The things he says to me, the way he looks at me, the way it feels when he holds my hand—they’re all things I’ve never felt before when I was alive. They’re so warm, and I feel like my heart is softening.”
Mrs cuts her off in a grave tone: “Get it together. Do you know what the most dangerous thing is to a ghost? It’s feelings. You think you’re a person and hurt and feel sad, and happy. And that’s where greed comes from—the greed to remain among the living, even as a malevolent ghost!”
She warns her that malevolent ghosts are not the same as her—they never disappear and wander forever, stuck amongst the worst of people, causing evil. She clasps Julia’s hands and begs her to steel herself and resolve her grudge, and move on to a better place. Tears fall as she nods, knowing that Mrs Jane is right about what she has to do. Mrs Jane comforts her and hugs her close, and she cries into her shoulder.
Julia is subdued at work the next day, even when julius whispers his plans to get them out of here as early as possible today. Mike chooses today of all days to insist on a staff night out, and julius has to say no so many times that he ends up snapping at him.
Julia takes the morning to go see her Dad, thinking that it’s her last day here as a ghost. She shows him how to do stuff more efficiently in the restaurant, and he picks up on the fact that she’s acting like they won’t see each other for a long time.
She tamps down her tears and says that she just might be busy for a while and can’t come as often, and he promises to do as she instructs. She thinks to herself that she might never see him again, and Dad should stop thinking about her and be healthy and happy with Alex now.
Julius makes sure to close early and tells Julia to pack and meet upstairs. He notes that she seems quiet, and when he guesses that she’s just so excited that she can’t express it, she goes with that.
But she looks sad when she’s alone, and has to pep-talk herself into packing and going on the trip. She knows she has to stick to her original plan and go, but she wars with herself for wanting to stay just a little longer.
Julius gets delayed when his Mom calls him drunk, and he asks Julia to meet him at the train station. She sits on the rooftop thinking back to all the things she’s experienced with julius , from their first kiss to their first handhold, and decides to put one foot in front of the other.
John watches as she leaves and then creeps up to the roof, where the dog barks at him aggressively. If he IS possessed and dogs can see ghosts.
He roots around Kate’s room and finds all of her ghost-warding paraphernalia, from scythe to strings of garlic, crosses, talismans, and ghost-warding beans. He throws them angrily, perhaps having connected all the dots between Julia and kate.
Julius arrives at the bar to pick his Mom up, only to find her totally sober. It’s not even a surprise anymore that she lied about that, but then Bella arrives too, and his mom invents an excuse to leave them alone.
Bella suggests a walk on their old college campus, and tells julius that she actually saw him first when they were in school, but he seemed so uninterested in her. She wonders if maybe they were so comfortable around each other and so used to each other that she didn’t know her own feelings.
He tries to cut her off, but she asks to speak first, knowing that she might not be able to get it out. But he cuts her off anyway since his news has to come first, and tells her that he has someone special in his life.
She can guess that it’s Kate without having to be told, and gets embarrassed at the rejection, wondering how she’s going to face him from now on.
Julius takes a moment to call Julia because he’s late to meet her at the train station, but she doesn’t answer. She’s actually still sitting in the playground in their neighborhood, purposely ignoring the call because she thinks he’s at the station looking for her.
She stares down at her phone and apologizes for not going: “But today isn’t the day. I can’t go like this. I know it’s selfish, but just a little longer… a little longer.”
She comes back home and calls out to julius , ready for him to be mad at her, but then he arrives behind her and starts apologizing profusely for not showing up. He assumes that she left her phone behind and waited for him, and she doesn’t bother explaining that she didn’t go either.
He makes it up to her by cooking her a fancy dinner, and tells her that he’ll always cook whatever she wants to eat. She says that what she really wants is fried intestines, and he cringes, but agrees to do it if she’ll forgive him for tonight.
Julia is surprised, and he admits that he’s been dragged around by those feelings for a really long time, and letting go feels like a relief. He turns to her and adds, “What I’m saying is, you have to take responsibility for me. You’re dead if you abandon me.”
She reaches out to touch his face, and he brings her hand up to his lips to kiss her gently. He kisses her softly on the lips before leaning them down into the tent, where he lies down on top of her and starts to unbutton his shirt. He reaches down to unbutton hers, and she squeezes her eyes shut nervously.
The Pen Creative World 